Mind over matter

I have really tried so hard to explain to you how it felt to have 1000 needles pricking at your brain, picking out tiny negative emotions and pinning them up on the wall. Like big, shiny needles with sharp points, my brain unfolds before them into grey mush and matter, and I feel bare. 

There must be a sinkhole inside of me, trying to suck out all my emotions and happy thoughts, leaving me dry and barren. Like a plug unplugging and the water going down the drain in a spiralling swirl of blackness. You could hear the pipes gurgling and protesting: No! Wait! You shouldn’t feel like this! 

The draining continues. 

Sometimes I feel like I need to purge all my feelings out of me, like impurities in a puddle or murky water. So much to purge. And now I am empty but still unclean, because you can’t rinse a container without water, and all the water has gone and evaporated like teardrops. 


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